I have this fixation on promises – They’re made to be kept. That’s why whenever I fail to fulfill one, the feeling of guilt just eats away at me.
Maybe it’s some experience I’ve had in the past, or maybe I’ve simply read too much unrealistic fiction, but to me, promises aren’t to be broken. Never. At least, without a good enough reason. And by good enough, I mean really good. The kind of it-was-hailing-and-I-had-to-take-detours-because-of-a-fallen-tree-and-I-had-a-car-accident-I’m-sorry-for-being-late good.
It’s something about trust, I think.
Without trust, I wouldn’t believe that you’d keep your word, and I won’t take it as a promise. An agreement maybe, or a set arrangement, but not a promise. When I promise someone something, I trust them enough to understand that I would really, really do my very best to keep my word, and not take it at face value.
So when I don’t keep my promises, I get upset. Very upset.
What to do other than apologize and try to amend the mistake I’ve made? I don’t know.